The Problem with Getting a Guru
When people look at a problem, there’s a tendency to look for expert assistance. To the gurus! As if they had some divine insight.
But I’ve never been on a big quest for a teacher, someone to teach me, to affirm my path and choices. It’s not that I’m not willing to be taught, and I certainly love to learn, but I just don’t see where studiously absorbing the accumulated paradigms along with the wisdom is very effective long-term.
To me, looking to a guru says “I am a child. I am a child, and I acknowledge it, now please teach me what I am lacking.” Which is great up to a point. I do agree with being humble and teachable.
But what I do not see is the expectation of growing up.
To me, that’s a problem.
Everyone needs to be taught from time to time. But for too long, we’ve given away our power, our intellectual and spiritual freedom to experts, talk show hosts, and gurus.
That’s all we’re after.
It all boils down to a confidence issue.
We don’t trust ourselves.
We don’t think we’re enough.
We can’t find our power, or if we did, we don’t feel confident that we can access it at will.
The lack is not ideas. It is not style. It’s not knowledge. It’s trust.
Trust in ourselves, in our abilities and our resilience.
Trust in our decisions.
Trust in our vision.
When a friend approached me to ask if I was setting myself up as a guru, I was appalled. Never, never, NEVER.
If I’m in my power, doing my Work, and people come to see me as a guru, that’s not something I can help. I’m nobody’s guru, I’m a traveller, same as you, with maybe a bit of a unique perspective on things. I don’t take apprentices. I only take people under my wing for a short time.
My endgame is always to get people to grow up. Allow them to abandon the safety nets of following where others lead secure in the knowledge the don’t need them.
They own the power.
It resides within them and is easily accessible to them.
We are all children, all blank slates, waiting to be written on. But we are also beings of unimaginable power and potential. And we have the answers. We’re just afraid to trust them.
Trust is essential. Trust and self-confidence. Not arrogance, ego, or fatalism.
Believe me, when you finally find your power, you’ll know the difference. You’ll blaze with it, and nothing will be the same for you ever again. You will truly know what it means to be limitless.
The Godhead in me greets the Godhead in you. Namaste.
What do you think? Agree? Disagree? Tell me your thoughts.
Hey, lookee what I just found... :) a couple of posts at Rupa's about precisely....... Gurus! http://theyogaofliving.net/2011/04/12/the-truth-about-guru/ and http://theyogaofliving.net/2011/04/15/across-the-universe-how-to-find-a-genuine-guru-3/ ~ I see you found them, too (when I grabbed the permalinks, and you've already commented!)
I think we're on the same track: It's not so much (usually) the teacher, as the person who wants 'to be taught', rather than wants 'to learn' --- quaLitative difference, there, as I see it: "YOU do to/for me" rather than "I do for myself, with your assistance"... that is the hallmark of 'still Aspirational'. Am I getting tangled up in the words?
To be "looking for a guru" is firmly planting yourself in what Bridget is calling the "Aspirational Market", eh? ~ with no end-game in sight or plan...
I did. Thanks for posting the links. I remember reading them and thinking, "but I don't wanna guru!" It's like bringing in a ringer, where's the fun in that?
No I think we're on the same track. I just often don't have to make the distinction between Aspirational and Transformational because aspiration types don't hang around me. But yes, there is a qualitative difference between, "I need you to teach me", and "I'm here to learn" but it's too subtle to use as an overt distinction because most people aren't *that* attuned to the nuances. So I tend to look at obvious markers; pragmatic action, critical thinking about conventional wisdom and advise, and a strong sense of following a path of one's own choosing.
Actually, I don't think that's quite fair. Generally people *want* to feel like they've gained mastery...i just don't see where it fits into the paradigm. It's not that the gurus are denying people, they're definitely not saying "You'll never achieve my level, but sure, keep trying" -- It's the act of promoting people to guru in your mind that makes their status unreachable. Because seriously, on what morning can you envision waking up and saying "Hey! I've levelled up! I'm a guru now."? That's never gonna happen. I don't object to the notion of learning from people; learn from everyone, or at least challenge yourself to. But don't put your teachers on a pedestal. They are learning, too.
That IS an important distinction: "It's the act of promoting people to guru in your (own) mind that makes their status unreachable.